Friday, November 25, 2011

im on my cell so if i typo suck it

so i wanted to post that i couldnt sleep, which i cant, but i took a good half hour to fix this dumb bum phone and to even get on this shit.
let me tell you the stress is building the fuck up. its like i was fine all semester, but the most boring canadian info humanities class might win over me, and i finally finnished my newspaper with the lil jews. and i have all these papers due and all that shit. since when am i supposed to not enjoy cejep? jeeeeeeeeez. but my one way to handle stress works out time nd time again. have a munchie, listen to the beatles, take a bath. yes, we all need alone time. shut upppp
i was really thinking about it and im actually scared shitless for the future. i mean like three things with the same deadline overwhelmes me enough that i blow it off, imagine when im actually an independant citizen. thats weird to think about. im tired
k im guna go sleep or try.
i wanna be a mom one day. to a boy cause god help me if i have a daughter whos anything like me
BYEEEEEEEEEEE I LUV U ALL ROFTLES

Monday, November 21, 2011

i see two guys in leather jackets arguing

so, the idea is, nobody is allowed to call me racist after this blog post, cause im an opinionated individual, but i really couldnt give a crap if you did cause i know im allowed to say whatever the fuuuuccckk i want. so shutup and listen.

one of my friends (who shall remain nameless cause it would look really bad on him) showed me this HILLARIOUS page on facebook called "I hate islam" with all these really funny pictures making fun of like islamic people and some were of christians and some were of jews. I laughed.. don't sue me for laughing, cause im pretty sure its legal to laugh at something funny.

what i honestly think is hillarious, is how people go so far just to insult someone else, and how it works. like im not about to say the N word or anything, but like people take ANYTHING as an insult. thats why i think religion is fucked up, because really, all it is is like a bunch of clubs, and you can join some, and you cant join others, and theres rules in every club. its stupid.

and its like people have to do absolutely nothing just to insult someone else. like if i wrote I HATE BLACK PEOPLE AND MUSLIMS THEY SHOULD ALL DIE, im going to be like shot for it. and honestly, why are people taking such offence. i mean who the fuck cares?

from an early point in our lives, we are taught not to care about what other people say, and then they get all insulted about so and so making fun of them. i mean honestly, it really doesnt matter. when someone makes fun of you, its just words, and its just ONE person, who probably means nothing to you anyways. 

honestly, wars and all that are so pointless. like i dont want to sound like a weirdo peace freak, but everything is basically pointless. all negative aspects, even the positive ones too. we all live, and we all die, and thats what basically happens. some people remember you well, some people dont remember you at all, and some people are glad you're gone. what should really matter is that you're happy with yourself when you're lying on your death bed.

I dont want to die with the sense that i spend all of high school crying over a group of fucking dilholes who treated me like shit. i wanna die knowing that i dont give a shit, and that i got over it because i proved those people wrong.

I guess its that all these races and all these people living in this world have to just like shut up. and if they dont, take their insults as a challenge. They call you a loser? prove to them your not a loser. Im not a loser cause i have friends, i am a loser cause i dont have many friends, but i can fix that if i tried. They call you a whore? prove to them your not. or, just dont let anyt of that shit bother you. realize that theres so much better in the world then the big fucking losers you have to deal with everyday.

ok im done.
enjoy your day
and fucking smile for once. frowns are ugly as ballllllllssssssssssssss

JUS

Sunday, November 6, 2011

diary of a chubby

feels like forever since i last posted. what is it, a month and ten pounds ago? i made that joke on purpose
so ive gained a mass of weight and im getting instructions from a black man online how to lose it. its not going to well but i mean, hey, im trying and i guess thats what counts.
i basically have either michael jackson the experience (which i havnt used since i was dumped, i dont know why), just dance 2 & 3 (which im not half bad at, but its weird thinking of myself dancing in my basement on my own), wii fit (which acts like it helps but really doesn't), and a black man on the internet. So theres my life right now, and im always hungry because healthy foods are never good enough for a woman who likes eating a LOT!
anyways, ive really been thinking about it, and to save the embarrassment of certain people who i love i wont say their names. I really do need to lose a couple pounds here and there, but i think apart from that, im kinda not that bad. I wont say im fat, because ive seen fat people and i would NEVER let myself get to that because its just like scary to think about (nothing against larger people you guys are awesome unless your assholes) and the truth is, im not fat, im not all that chubby either... i know im getting there, but its not THAT bad like lets all calm down.
and i think the main reason why people are so obsessed with being perfect looking is to impress other people. i spend all morning doing my hair and choosing clothes even if i pretend i dont, to impress certain people, and we all do, even if we say we dont. when you choose clothes in the morning, if you were one of the rare people in the world who really didnt want to impress anyone, you would not worry about your clothes matching, or if your tummy hangs out or if something is ten sizes too big on you, you just wanna be comfy. I wish i was like that, but the reality is nobody is like that. But really, the reason why everyone does that is to impress other people.
i think that impressing people is so stupid, because unless they are dumb (most people today actually) they wont give a shit about what your wearing and even if you look mad hot and have nice titties, if your an idiot and have a bad personality, you wont be going too far. What people should start working on is their personalities rather than how they dress & look.
so heres the deal, i want to lose weight. at first, i was being basically forced to, and i really didnt want to. and the ore i gained, and the more my friends told me i didnt need to lose weight, i kept eating, and gaining, and eating, and gaining. Finally i realized none of my jeans fit, and my shirts had a big ol tummy sticking out of it. I've never been so embarrassed to realize when i was trying to pick out nice clothes to impress everyone, that I had no clothes that fit. i really didnt fit into anything i owned and it was terrible.right now, im losing, or trying to at least , weight for myself. i want to feel like my old self again, and i think that i feel better about excersizing and looking good when i know its for myself and not for anyone else.
basically i feel like if i didnt want to be skinnier, i wouldnt be. i think people have to stop impressing others with their looks, because if your looks and your clothes are all you have going for you, sure, for now you'll get all the ladies/guys that you want, and you can be all sexy and whatever you want, but as you get older you'll realize that people want to marry and hire and be around other people who have personaliy, who are at least a little bit intelligent, and as you get older, if looks matter to you, then you probably wont have as many friends as you used to in high school.

this is written for not only my own pleasure of writing, but as a thanks to all the people who are my friend because of who i am on the inside, and for accepting me, even when nobody else did. <3 love you guys.

sincerely, JUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS