"love"

sudden realization much?

i just realized, that ive been trying to get one of my friends to start talking to me again, but i dotn want to talk to them first, cause then they win (even though they dont know about the game were playing). i know, im a girl

but really.. maybe they just DONT like me, you know? i have people that i just dont like, and i dont "avoid them", but like i try not to make a huge conversation with them.. and i just realized, i'd bet this guy, who used to be like.. my brother fuck, just.... doesnt enjoy me. cause he never talks to me, he only calls when im with someone he wants to talk to, and he doesnt actually miss me or have time for me.

my mom always said, if you're important enough to someone, they'll find the time for you, because you're a priority to them.

well i guess im not a priority to him, and i always knew i wasnt, but clearly the guy just doesn't like me. and that sucks, but i guess thats life.

i also realized that i have to stop saying i love people. the word love has no meaning anymore. actually, in my vocab, the words love favorite best friend dont exist.

hes not my best friend, nor do i "love" him in any way. jeez.

i have to stop saying that someone is like my brother (or sister to be politically correct). i have to stop saying that they are like my best friend and i love them. its ridiculous. i can easily name my best friends right now, with letters obvs.

BJJJAS

everyone else is a really good friend, a friend, or nothing at all.

honestly, i can say i love the people on that list.

i wanna say that i love my other friends, cause in a sense i love my friends, but i dont really LOVE them, but i love them. its tough to explain , but you all do it too, so stfu.

anyways. thats my big typing orgasm of today..

actually not of today cause this is my third post today.

ah.

k bye

ha

imagine people actually read my blog? ha.

oucherfuck

so i need a root canal.

key word: pain?

fuck yes. my left side of my mouth is like... siring with pain all over.

anyways. so the list went on.

no more soda sweets sugars chocolates salts & junk

fml right?

well its not all that bad. i mean i can still have my beloved starches, my sunflower seeds (new fetish) and my juice. oh and of course the best part, i can still drink V8 and not be yelled at.

could you even imagine life without v8? i couldn't.

then i got all soft, because one of those comercials with all of the black kids happened (not being racist)

meet alex. alex is only 10 years old but has to take care of his three younger siblings for his parents aren't alive anymore. he often misses meals and is too young to have to do this alone. But you and your family can help children like alex all around the world.

and i actually got to thinking. that maybe my root canaled pain-filled tooth is trying to save me. I mean really, my gluttony has always gotten the best of me, and i have gained a few liters lately.

imagine being like "alex"? i really was thinking about it as my nerve in my molar or canine or whatever was throbbing. i though, maybe its smarter if i eat some healthier shit. i mean my life could be so much worse. and i obviously dont want to go through this bull again.. right?

presto, a new child is born inside of me.

now if only i could fucking live until december 10th when i get the root canal. that would be a miracle.

the moral of the story is to eat healthy, dont take advantage, and FUCKING FLOSS. or you'll end up crying every time u drink/ eat anything and it hits that tooth,. and taking like five tylenol a night for pain.

thats all for now.

from the desk itself, wearing a robe cause i just showered,

jussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

peace in.. dont hear that often eh big guy?

I've found my solution to life.

We gotta bring the peace in.

why do people say "peace out" when they say goodbye to someone?

Why do we fight so much.

Its all about being comfortable with ourselves. I finally get it, and writing about it makes me all the more sure how true it might be.

Why do we fight? as a defense.

Why do we defend? to protect ourselves.

we want to be right, we dont want to look bad. why not? idgaf if i look like an idiot. If im wrong, then im wrong. why must we try so hard to make someone else join us? why is it called an opinion if were not alowed to have our own? why is it called personal if its just someone elses idea?

honestly, thats why I write, to find my own opinion and inner peace. it all makes sense to me now, that if you let someone shove their ideaoligy and opinion down your clogged up throat and let it touch your brain and heart, than your nothing. you are not opinionated, cause its not yours. its ridiculous how people let that happen. thats why people fight, and people are sad. people are sad because they feel either unloved, unheard or unappretiated. well. start to fucking appretiate yourself and fucking love yourself and listen to yourself. we dont need anyone else to accept ourselves.

thats why im such a loser at school. cause i dont fucking accept my own opinions and myself the way I am. I just hope to be accepted and stand all my insecure little fucking self being a little gay fucking loser.

NO! im not letting that shit change me anymore.

i say fuck the world.

and thats all i gotta say about that.

you have friends, you have enemies. thats life.

live with it, or fucking kill yourself.

igght pce in.

been a while much?

wow. live has its new curves.

key word: curvy?

no but really. I havn't written in practically a decade. I've been busy jeez dont pressure me.

anyways. life is silly now. joking its ... well how can i put this...

HELL&HEAVEN&CONFUSION&WHAAAATT!?

so yea. heres how I can explain it:

HELL: so school totally sucks balls. I can't walk around without being thrown with a new insult. I can't feel right, walking around the halls. I avoid, I am alone.

oh and im a horrible sleeper, I'm losing some friends, and people suck.

HEAVEN: im kinda in love with this guy alex. i know ew, havn't i learnt better than to be falling in love and shit? well to fucking bad. I'm like obsessed with the guy. whatever more on that shtuff lates.

CONFUSION: like wtf am I doing? i dont understand what im doing every day. and im thinking more deeply into my life to try and understand what its about and why im alive and whaaaatttt!

WHAAAAAAAT!?: idgaf. im on twitter now

search: JayyFranks

..i think thats my twitter, who da fuck knows .

well. thats me right nao.

ill write back soon.

i gotta pee.

BIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

ive never had much respect for people with regrets.

not the "i regret drinking that much" or the "i regret not studying for that test", but like the life regrets. i used to say that i regretted things i had done that had changed everything, like a person i meet, a person i "hook up" with, a person i date, someone i hurt or someone i loved.

i dont respect people with regrets because if you regret something that changes your life, you are pretty much saying you regret your life today.

sure, i wish i hadn't done certain things i did, but i sure as hell dont regret them. i can look at myself today. I am a writer, i express myself, im not afraid to show my emotions, im not afraid to be myself, and i can finally stick up for myself against losers that are fake and shouldnt matter to me.

You know, ive been hurt, ive been used, i was bulimic, i was almost depressed, i smoked to make myself happy, and i cried my eyes out for the ones i loved, but that makes me who i am today, and i dont regret who i am, cause all that shit that got me here were just little bumps in the road, and made me a stronger person.

i dont regret life, i dont regret decisions, and i most of all would never regret love. because without it, we are absolutely nothing. without love, theres greed and hatred. and we dont need that again.

(;

capitalism at its greatest.

soz, i was on this site and there was this question and answer thing that this guy answered, and i had some thought on it that i felt i should share :)

Q: If you could change anything in the world, what would it be and why?

A: I'd change the face that our country is dependent on foreign labor which would open new jobs in the USA for Americans to do which in turn would probably lower poverty rates.

yes, i felt something strong about it. i really admire that he answered that. the problem is that americans (no offense) have learnt to be like this and not work very much to get what they want. they are a capitalist society so if the rich people are getting what they want for a good price, thus making them richer, they have no reason to care what happens to the people below them, the poor people, because they're happy, creating poverty. if the people on top would become more socialist (which wont happen very easily) then they would care a bit about their society and not just themselves, and they would deffs contribute to helping reduce poverty. but unfortunately since politicians and rich people are almost like best friends. the rich politicians are payed and make rules that are in favor of the richer people, thus making the rich richer, and the poor poorer.

its a tough world to face, but people have just grown up to get what they want, not caring about the people they hurt to get it. thats how the great depression started; by greed, and i can honestly say that since this recent recession, there is a possibility of another depression coming because of the greed and the over consumption of not only the US, but around the world.

sadly, there's not much that can be done to change it because even i wont stop buying things "made in china" because they are things i want, no matter who makes them. maybe next time try to buy safer, and more locally.

but thats just what i think (;

its a cling thing

havnt written in a while, i guess the mood was gone.

you know, my mood has been quite neutral i guess. ive been spending so much time dreaming of this fantasy world, when im supposed to be this down to earth girl who knows what she can get and who knows who she is.

i know who i am i guess, but maybe its just hard to admit who i am. maybe its hard to admit what i want.. i dont know whats been inside me, but its like a bug thats just eating my insides and wont go away.

i know im young, but i want love. like i really want to feel something with someone. i dont want to look for it, because then thats being desperate, and im not desperate. im just so tired of all these guys out there that think they know what they want but in truth they know nothing. i wish there was a guy who was, well who was as clingy as i am. yea im clingy. i like to talk to the person im with at least twice a day (good morning and good night) , and id like to see the person im dating at least once a week. is that so hard to understand? oh and i miss someone when im not with them. im sorry if thats such a crime to all these guys in the world, but wether they like it or not, a girl is going to miss you if they are dating you.

girls are complicated, ill tell you that. BUT we arent hard to understand. When we ask you what were thinking, we just want to know. When we tell you we miss you, you dont have to say it back, but it would be nice. When we ask you a question, we dont want a lie. its really not that big of a request. and when some stupid asshole comes into our lives and by fluke we fall for what we think he is, we actually want to be friends sometimes even though they hurt us so much, BECAUSE WERE ACTUALLY NICE.

like all these stupid people in the world that dont understand what it takes to be in a stable relationship are just going to fail in it. its not that much of a challenge. just be honest, talk to the person, and actually show a little compassion once in a while.

oh and have the dignity to break up with us in person. its embarrassing when you do it any other way.

sorry for complaining. im just angry.

pce,

jus.

;D

god its been a while.

xox- glad to be back.

jus.

openly dumb.

people who are open about being perverted.

i mean everyone is a perv to their own extent, but those people who litterally only talk to you to get stuff out of you, and are open bout it? its just wrong and stupid.

i guess i can respect people who are honest, but at least try to be a little bit nice to me before asking me to flash you on webcam.. and the funny part is the fact that I really wont do it if thats all you want, (i wont do it in any situation, but thats not the point).

i dont want to meet you and have the first thing you say is 'show me ____' (fill in the blank). because i dont even know you. why dont you try to get to know me? maybe im this super amazing person, and you might like me a lot if you got the time to maybe know me before you try to get with me, via webcam or even in person.

and if its via webcam, the question that i guess will always remain un-answered is; why not watch porn if you REALLY want to see this stuff? i mean like the girls there will do anything you really want, but you choose to ask a random girl for it? its extremely dumb, and maybe before a guy like that asks to see stuff on a girl, they can think of watching porn first, because its probably much more satisfying.

ill never understand guys, and ill never understand the way that they get girls to do things like that by being a rude, obnoxious asshole, but i guess if its working for them, then why stop?

what i think should happen is that girls should start realizing that they want a nice guy who will respect them, and then ditch the assholes, and then the assholes will realize what they're doing is dumb and wrong, and then become a little bit nicer.

and girls, start to respect yourself a little bit more. you deserve a good guy who will treat you right. you dont need to show off yourself to the world to get the love and the admiration you want. start noticing that you can become admired by admiring yourself. these guys dont love you. they love your body and they love what your giving them. they'll tell you they love you, but they really dont, like at all. sorry , but its the honest truth.

btw, its good to be back to writing :) xox.

jus.

never was and never will be.

Go all the way ?

No regrets ?

I don't regret the past few years.

Because I learnt from them.

But if I could take it all back, I would.

I regret loving you. I regret trying to impress you.

I will never try for you.

I will never kiss or touch you again.

You don't care about me.

You just cant get any other piece of ass.

You just want me. sadly, I don't want you.

Your a sad, pathetic excuse for a man.

Your not even a man. Your a little boy.

One with hormones, but I can't please you, nor do I want to.

I would have rather been your friend.

I wished you were more mature.

If you were a mature person, you'd be a friend.

You tell me, nay, convince me that you cant stay away.

Thats because I kept going back to you.

And thats why were done.

Something about me makes you go nuts?

I'll teach you how to control it.

Grow a pair of your own before trying to fuck up someone else.

Your not mister perfect.

Your not even close.

Your cute face and amazing eyes don't work on me anymore.

I used to think I loved you.

But I never really did.

I always thought so, but I was, and always will be, that dumb.

I lusted you.

I wanted you to love me, for real.

But you never did, and for that I am thankful.

You want me so bad.

You'll go all the way.

Unfortunately for you, its over.

Goodbye loser, Goodbye loafer, Goodbye pain, Goodbye hell.

Hello life.

friends can be regained.

i love the guy i wrote that last blog about..

crazy eh?

hes like, my altime best friend, and we fight a lot, and we used to fight a lot more,

but, sadly. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . we got into a bigger one,

and what i said back then, still feels the same, but you know.. hes different.

forgive and forget babes. :)

writteeee soooonn ?

oh i will darlings :)

acceptance

if you can't accept me for who i am, then you cant accept me at all.

dont ask me to change, dont ask me to tweak myself, because I am who I am, and usually, the better people in life learn to live with the flaws i have because the good of me overpowers the bad.

I can admit it; I'm stubborn at times, and I get easily aggravated at the littlest things. I get emotional fast and I can be a bit of a downer. Im annoying, and a bit of a freak, but thats who I am.

you cant tell me to change myself, and you cant tell me that I have serious problems, when clearly, the one with the problems is you. you have a serious problem with who I am.. and thats not right. if your so mad and so pushed back about how i am, then dont try to change me, just leave.

Plus, if you dont like me, and you dont accept me, why would I even want your acceptance? Your clearly looking to accept someone else, because if you wanted to accept me so much, you would; flaws and all. You want to accept and be friends with someone thats less annoying? then find that person, because sadly, thats not who I am, and im not about to change who I am for someone like you.

And you know what? If you dont accept me for who I am, I sure as hell dont accept you for who you are right now, because who you are is someone who is a jerk for trying to change me.

You said you wont accept me until i change?

Well, you'll be waiting a long long long time for that one; Im not about to change anytime soon.

v i p puuhhleeeaassseee !

exclusive girl here.

only kidding.

haha?

allright. so the other day, a friend told me that i should be less 'say yes to everyone' and more, 'only going to say yes to very certain people'. I said to them, thats not how i am! i mean, im an individual who doesnt like to reject, and who doesnt like saying no, in some cases obviously i have to say no, but why is it wrong to say yes too much?

its because i could get so easily hurt by the amount of people i let into my life, and the amount of people i trust. I used to trust everyone.. ive condenced my trust list a bit since then, yet i still find out that people take advantage of that.

i guess i could start to say no to people more often, but who likes to see a sad or dissapointed face? thats my problem, im too nice. sure, i can be a huge bitch, but when it comes to myself, im too nice, because i let people walk all over me, yet i still forgive them. I wish i wasnt forgiving, but i am. that could be a good thing, but why cant i learn to just say no?

its becuse i hate seeing people sad, and i just want to be friends with everyone. and also, i dont like to dissapoint people. if someone says that they dont like me, then i let it go. why try and impress someone if they dont like you?

im right for doing that right? i didnt do anything wrong. its a win/win. I dont have to deal with trying so hard, and they dont have to deal with me. i think thats fair, and i also know inside that they missed out on a good friendship.

so why are we so precise about who our friends are?

why dont people start to explore other groups of people they never thought they could be friends with? you could be surprised.. i know i've been surprised.

i guess its just that we have to learn that theres more people out there. and sure, i say yes to being anyones friend, but at least i try.. and id rather be hurt and learn from that then never open myself up to anyone at all.

aurevoirr (:

little love never hurt

i wish i was a narcissist.

i wish i admired myself in the mirror every day, no matter how bad i looked.

i wish i was able to tell myself that i am amazing and that nobody could change me.

i wish i could look at myself and say that im beautiful and that nobody can tell me otherwise.

sadly, i cant do that, and thats what i have to deal with.

its funny, because i used to be able to let any insult slide, and even though i was always sensitive, it was towards others, and anything that anyone said, didnt matter, because i had an amazing self confidence and that stuff never mattered.

then, when i hit high school, the people got meaner, and much more mature. i had always been very immature and i still am, and i was bad with first impressions and i didnt have control over myself and what i did and said.

i realized that people called me weird in a bad way. people didn't want to associate with me because i was immature and strange, so i changed myself..

i remember when insults never hurt me, and i miss that part of me.

i remember when recently i had a terribly low self esteem, and i would hate myself for reasons even i didnt know or understand. i just knew i wasnt fit out for this world, and nobody wanted me here anyways.

its funny how one can experience so much and survive it. no, i didnt have a cancer or something majour and extreme, but the little things piled up into bigger things, and i feel like a true survivor right now for still enduring them.

now, i dont mind being insulted very much. i know that certain people just arn't worth the trouble of feeling bad for myself. i love myself, but i still get effected by the people around me.

i think that everyone is immature and childish. people are pigs sometimes, and they dont care about anyone but themselves, but i guess its good to be selfish sometimes, because then you develop a sence of love for yourself.

My name is justine frankel, and i think i love myself.

i think im pretty. i think that im funny. i think im a good friend, and allthough i can have a big mouth sometimes, i can keep a secret really well. i am a bit of a freak and i get overly excited sometimes, but i can keep my cool when i need to. i can be really sensitive and i cry a bunch. I love a lot, but i hate when people i love hurt me, all of the others mean nothing to me, because they dont love themselves enough to be nicer to others.

we should all learn to love a little.

grow a pair, and while your at it, grow a brain too

thats just fucked up.

some fucker. just seriously. oh wow.

i cant even fucking believe it.

some dumb ass hole who obviously has my number decided to write it on a bus, and wrote to text it cause apparently i offer 'sexual activity'..

who the fuck does that?

like oh wow. im just so.. disgusted in people right now.

someone texts me and says; who is this?

i answer, urm, whos this?

they say; i found your number in my room.. so i was wondering

and i say; oh well its justine, who is this?

and they say; someone wrote your name in the bus, saying your giving sexual acitvity.

and i FLIIIPPPP!!!

and then they ask if i want them to take it off.. and i said yes.. and after thanking them a million times, i still wanted to puke.

i hear that everyone does it.

well they shouldnt, and it doesnt make it okay..

its not even just that. the respect people have for eachother is just horrible. im so revolted by the way we treat eachother. its just dumb. one day, someones going to do it back to you.

i believe in karma.

and shes a slutty little bitch, and shell get you.

i dont know why people are like this.

it gets on my nerves.

you get on my nerves.

fuck you. thats all i can say to people like you who do things like this.

just.. go die. i know its not very nice to say.. but if you can write on busses, then i can write on blogs. their both public. the bus isnt nexessarily permanent, but since im not saying any names, neither is the blog.

you should just reconsider what you say about other people.

because i have feelings too. why the hell do you think im writing this blog?

so that i can let it out like a normal person.

i dont let it out in hurting others.

if whoever you are has a problem with me, then say it to my face.

dont embarrass me like that.

people are dumb.

raise your glass

remember when we used to have imaginary friends?

why dont we still have them anymore!? i used to have an imaginary friend, i eally dont remember his name, i think it was Renadlo or Augustus.. something evil sounding (not saying if your name is one of the two that your evil)... and he was a complete ass. he'd make me do bad things and get in trouble in preschool and kindergarden. So then one night i though up Esmerelda, who was my nice imaginary friend, and together we shoved evil friend in a box. i remember that i taped up the box so he'd never come out.. and it was so so many years ago that i had them, but i remember in like grade 5 or 6 when i rummaged through my stuff, i found a taped up box, and i laughed but at the same time, i kind of got scared, and im not embarrassed to admit it. i was always scare that that friend would attack me or something.

quicksearch; insane girl who still believes in imaginary stuff

allthough i knew it wouldnt happen, like ever; i still threw it away quickly, because holding that box made me feel like a little kid again.

You know, i actually miss being younger so much. where the meanest thing was 'im not your friend anymore' and the love was when two kids played lego or somthing like that together. where your biggest worry was that you didnt draw in the lines, and your way of being with someone was a playdate. when you had sleepovers and talked about spongebob and you smoked popey sticks to look like the older kids.

I miss the days.. its funny how now were the people we used to look up to. we used to watch the big kids walk around and we'd be like.. one day, thats us. and when it is us, we look up to people even older. i wonder what happends when were like 30 years old, will we still be looking up? or will we look down and wish we were that age.

I think the "age to be" is around 16 to 22. during those years, we like everything and junk. but if your younger, you look up to them, and when your older, you look down (in a looking up kind of way) and wish you were them.

life may be fucked up, but we can stop ourselves from fucking up life.

Kiss me all night, dont ever let me go !

kay guys. new obsession song ; If we ever meet again - Timberland ft. Katy Perry.

its an adorable song, but it has my favourite thing.. when the end of the song like changes tunes into a total different song. i think its too funny. i wonder why people do it..

wierd?

i also wonder why all songs are about love now..

i remember when songs were about making friends and dancing.

now they're pretty much about money, 'pussy', weed, having sex, love problems/solutions and meeting someone new that you want to get with.

there in lies the reason why there is so much conflict. because in these songs it shows how your man isnt right if he does this or that, because the song told you about it.

whered the good songs like barney's classic "clean up" song or "please and thank you". those are classic songs, and obviously we dont want to sing or dance to them, but cant you use something positive as an inspiration? why do we sing about the bad things in life.

for once id like to hear a song about a guy who goes on a walk and see's how the world is beautiful. Sure, the idea is a little bit crummy, but if someone expanded on it, im sure we could have a hit that you would actually listen to.

but we relate to this music!

its only because we MAKE our situations turn out like the music system. we adjust our life so that we can say "yea, what just happened is just like that song i heard on the radio last night".

i'd bet if we actually lived our own life, music involved of course, but without letting us change the way we think, then music would be better, would be more civalized. wouldnt be about racism or hate.

thanks for reading (:

tik tok

you know what i hate?

waiting!

because your parents call you crazy for being on the computer for so long, but your not on for games or anything.. your on for that one person.. and your staring at the list of online people, hoping with every bone in your body that they'll pop up, but they just dont.

i hate waiting, cause it give you the worst possible situation.

they arent online because they think im wierd, or they know i want them online. maybe they blocked me? but in the end, they were busy, or their mom was using the computer.

i hate waiting, because it makes you want them online even more then you allready do, and if they dont show, you feel like hell, because you didnt get what you wanted.

i hate waiting, because it takes too long. and because its more time that your not spending talking to the person your waiting for.

re-shout

just a quick shout out to my best bud alex padowicz, ily buddy and happy birthdayy!!

cookies gone bad

so i decided for valentines day i would make cookies for my family, cause im awesome.

keyword; awwwe

so im feeling all confident, making these cookies, because im home alone and my parents never let me bake when nobodys home. i was really excited about it, until it told me to put two cups of chocolate chips. Me being me, i put the two cups like it said, and then i realized there was a lot of friggen chocochips in there. i decided it was because it was resting ontop of the layer of flour, and it really wasnt that much, and when i mixed it would be a normal size.

quicksearch; really wrong girl uses too many chips

so like me again, i used waaay too many. i decided to let it go and just make the cookies. A heart for my dad, an 'A' for my sister, and a 'C' for my mom, even though she'd never eat it, and then i used leftovers to make normal cookies.

note to self; if one puts cookies too close, they will turn out ugly

as my friend alex described it, the 'A' looked like a blob, the 'C' looked like an ass and the heart looked like a foxes head. they turned out really ugly, and stuck together. My sister helped out a bit by trying to reshape the letters and make them look better, but it was a big big fail. I laughed because its so like me to fuck up my first time they trust me to bake, and after wasting all of the chocochips and making ugly cookies (ones that tasted like pure pure sugar), i was never to be trusted alone again.

funny how strangely, im okay with that.

I'm always so used to baking with my mum, and ive always loved baking with her, because we do the silliest things, and baking alone felt different. when i made a mess of myself, i had nobody to laugh with, and that was a little bit sad.

i guess i wrote this because in the spirit of valentines day (keyword; bleughh), i realized that doing things alone and being trusted isn't what i thought it would be. Yea it was cool, but i guess i really realized how much i appreciate my family being around to boss me around and not trust me when i do something dumb. i also appreciate my family to be around when i do something amazing and when funny things happen. Just don't tell them all of that, because then they'll know that i actually like them, and we dont want that to happen do we?

quicksearch; justine attacking you with knife when you tell her parents

by the way, that quicksearch was a kidd. :)

so happy valentines day (BLEUUGHHH!!) and i hope you realize things like i did today, cause its always nice to know that other then your 'valentine' or your crush, your family and friends love you too <3

PS; HAPPY BIRTHDAY BEANYYY! (shoutout to my best budd evahh!)

dumb people like you

i hate dumb people like jessica dokis (:

but i actually adore her. cause she has..

well.. nice tits (:

bang bang bang the drum

the second i see her face, i just want to .. yell? cry? attack?

quicksearch; crazy bitch on the loose

sometimes i just walk around my house naked.

that has nothing to do with it, but everything at the same time. i want to feel exposed to myself, so that i know that im really there, that im not invisible to myself.

feaked? yes, i am too. you could read this and not understand what im saying or what i mean, but i know what i mean and what im saying, and i love that im talking to myself, but talking to the rest of the world at the same time.

you know, when i started this, i was going to bash someone without saying their name, what they've done or who they are. ive realized that bashing on someone is just so dumb, because that person is so not worth even a sentence in my blog. ill just tell you this; they make me mad, they ruined my high school experience, and they're a thief. not of things, but.. of people, and of personalities, of emotions and souls.

keywords; robber, whore, hater, gossiper, shittalker, lifetaker.

and then theres me.. naked old me walking around my house.

i expose myself, to remind myself, that despite this person, or even these people, i am still myself, and im still there, and if i can survive that, then i can survive anything. i am a blogger, i am a writer, i am a psycho, i am a bitch...

at least i know who i am.

love is forever

Do you believe in love at first sight?
Do you believe in fate?
Do you believe that out there, there is someone for everyone?
Do you believe that you have a soul mate?

If your answers to these questions are yes, then you and I are on the same page. If no, then let me explain to you what will happen in the future..

Everyone is born with a soul mate. Weather you believe in it or not, it is there. Someone, somewhere, is destined to be with you. You might meet them when your 12, or when your 38, but they are out there, looking for you, just like you are looking for them. There can be many other relationships on the way to finding your soul mate, and you might fall in love once or twice, but there is no love like the love of a soul mate, when you know that you have found your other half, your missing piece of the puzzle. You will know when you have found them.

But what if you don't believe in them? We all have the time to say "I'm destined to be alone forever, god wanted me to be single forever." about a billion times, but then we laugh later on about it. But what if you don't laugh? I can say that I've said the "nobody loves me" line about a trillion times, but I know its untrue. I've tried to give up on love, but then that person walks by, and I say to myself "screw giving up, they're hot!".

Trust me, giving up is probably the stupidest thing to ever do. Not only are you giving up on yourself, but you are also giving up on the people who love you. There are people in the world that actually care about you, and want you to be happy, weather you like it or not. And the worst part of giving up, is giving up on your other half.

Think of it this way; If a child is missing, and the parents are searching and searching, and don't find him for a while, they would give up, right? I know that this doesn't compare to love, but if these parents give up, they are not only giving up on themselves, but what about that missing child? They are giving up on their "other half".

So if you decided to completely give up on love, and live a life alone, that's your decision. But think about how your other half is feeling? Searching and searching for you, and since you gave up on them, they ever find you, and they end up living a lonely life, because of what you chose to do.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to say your a bad person, and I'm not trying to take away your views on life and change them to mine. All I wanted you to do, was hear me out, take what I said into consideration.

I recently watched the modern version of Shakespeare's "Romeo and Juliet". My teacher asked us to answer the following question; Is there any room in today's society for a love story like this?. I was taken by surprise by this question, and it forced me to think. Of course the rest of my class said no right away, but I disagree in a sense

I agree and disagree. The reasons behind this were simply that it isn't possible because of us. We talk so low and treat ourselves so negatively. If we didn't think of ourselves so badly, maybe there would be room for love story's like this. We all say no right away, because we as a society don't think we can handle that kind of pressure. We act as though we are weak and cannot do anything, even love.

I think that if we believed a little more in love, and believed in ourselves, maybe, just maybe, our society would change its views on life. Maybe we would have more love and have more soul mates. Maybe people wouldn't give up so easily.

Also, why do they think that love story's don't happen every day? Sure, not in the same context as Romeo and Juliet, but the same kinds of topics. Think homosexuals for an example. Two people of the same gender are in love, yet they "can't" be together, because of society and because of how badly gay people are treated.

Thats all i gotta say about that..

i am facebook; hear me roar

wowza. facebook is owning us all.

i always knew that we'd become mindless zombies one day, but a website made us do it?

kudos facebook. now you know us inside out, and now we'll never be able to live normally, because our life is posted on the internet, and our social status is based on how many friends we have, how many people write on our walls and who has the 'sexyest name rating'.

keywords; reality check, information overload

check out reality facebookers; how many of those 645 people do you actually talk to?

information on that website is overloaded, and soon they will be able to control our lives.

QUICKSEARCH: farmville ?

did you know that farmville has the most users on facebook? did you also know that its like owning your own farm? fun right? WRONG WRONG WRONG!!!

I know a girl who knows a person and blah blah blah; but she cried when her crops died...

I know a guy who knows another person and bleh bleh bleh; but he gave his friend his password because he had work, and he needed someone to water his plants.

facebookers, its a virtual farm. get over it.

this is the harm that this society gives us, and we dont really care, do we?

think about your future. it may seem innocent and fun now, but websites like this can take over your life.

the fun of blogging

the fun of blogging is that allthough i might not be anonymous, i can make up names, make up a life for myself. but the more fun part is that i know i can make believe and play pretend, but i wont. because maybe thats just who i am, or its the right thing to do. ive realized how hard it will be to write here, knowing that anyone and everyone can read it, but also, this piece of ugly blog is meant for me to bash, vent, and live. dont like it? suck my dick. (: